Life in the Gutter

While most of the speculation about getting fired rests on Lane Kiffin in Oakland, his Raiders can't compare in how bad they are to the three teams at the bottom. It's not as if these three teams are just coming up short in hard-fought games, like the Dolphins of last year did in several games. These teams are just pitiful. The '01 Panthers (record 1-15), the '96 Jets (1-15), the '73-74 Oilers (2-26), the '76-77 Buccaneers (2-26), the (insert any year in the 1990's) Bengals (19-52 under Dave Shula) could look like the '85 Bears compared to these teams. Fortunately for humanity, none of these three teams play each other.
Kansas City Chiefs (32 points for, 78 points against)-Under Dick Vermeil, the Chiefs had one of the best offenses in the NFL. Under Herm Edwards, they have one of the most predictable. Of course, with a starting trio of Damon Huard, Brodie Croyle, and Tyler Thigpen, don't be surprised. After Vermeil retired, the Chiefs' management was just gushing over getting Edwards from New York. The result? A 13-23 record, and losses in 12 of the last 12 games. Edwards once said, "Hello? You play to win the game!" These guys just play to show the team has a pulse. I'm not convinced as of yet. Ironically, we only have to travel across the state of Missouri to find the next terrible team.
St. Louis Rams (29 points for, 116 points against)- Yes, this is the team that won the Super Bowl in 2000 and went to another one in 2002. The "Greatest Show on Turf" is now an episode of "Football Follies." These guys just stink, and some of it stems from horrific coaching by Scott Linehan, who probably won't last through the bye week (you know, there actually used to be good NFL head coaches in Missouri). Linehan's latest move has been to replace Pro-Bowl QB Marc Bulger with concussion-prone Trent Green, all of this behind a line that couldn't pass block against the "Little Giants." Ladies and Gentlemen, start your Fantasy players against these guys.
Detroit Lions (58 points for, 113 points against)- GM Matt Millen has been shown the door, something long overdue (and all the overrated WR's mourn). However, there is a huge road ahead, because these guys have now lost ten of their last eleven games, their only win coming against (guess who!) the Kansas City Chiefs. They did manage to build a one point lead over Green Bay in week two, but then surrendered 24 points in the final five minutes. The crowning insult was losing in week 3 to San Francisco, beat by Mike Martz, the OC they fired, and J.T. O' Sullivan, the QB they cut. Martz, who was criticized for not running the ball enough in Detroit, ran all over Detroit with Frank Gore. If I were Detroit, I'd be missing Wayne Fontes right about now.